Disclaimer: This article is purely for entertainment purposes. We at Northern 92 Tattoo Studio in Burnley absolutely recommend actual therapy for serious mental health concerns. We’re brilliant at tattoos, but we’re not qualified to fix your childhood trauma—though we can certainly help you cover it with a lovely dragon.
The Age-Old Dilemma
You’ve had a rubbish week. Your ex has moved on suspiciously quickly, your boss is still a nightmare, and you’re fairly certain your houseplant is judging your life choices. So naturally, you’re faced with the modern existential question: should you book a therapy session or get a tattoo?
At Northern 92 Tattoo Studio, we’ve noticed some interesting parallels between our services and those blokes with psychology degrees. Here’s our completely unscientific comparison of dealing with life’s problems through ink versus having a chat with someone who nods professionally.
Cost Analysis: Your Wallet’s Perspective
Therapy
- £50-100 per session
- Weekly sessions for months (or years)
- Potential total: The price of a decent second-hand car
Tattoos
- One-time payment (unless you become addicted, which… fair warning)
- Permanent results
- No recurring appointments unless you fancy a touch-up
Winner: Tattoos (according to your bank account, not your therapist)
Time Investment: Patience Required
Therapy
- 50 minutes of talking about your feelings
- Weeks of “processing”
- Years of “working through issues”
- Lifetime of saying “Well, my therapist says…”
Tattoos
- 2-6 hours of productive silence
- Immediate visual results
- Instant conversation starter
- Lifetime of explaining what it means to curious strangers
Winner: Depends on whether you prefer talking about problems or having people ask about your arm art in Tesco
Pain Factor: No Pain, No Gain
Therapy
- Emotional discomfort
- Confronting uncomfortable truths
- Realising your mum might have been right about some things
- The gradual dawning that you might actually be the problem
Tattoos
- Physical discomfort that ends when the session does
- Knowing exactly when the pain will stop
- Pain that produces something beautiful
- Endorphin rush that makes you want to book another appointment immediately
Winner: Tattoos (at least you get something pretty out of the suffering)
Results: What You Get for Your Money
Therapy
- Better understanding of yourself
- Improved coping mechanisms
- Healthier relationships
- Reduced anxiety and depression
- The ability to use phrases like “emotional regulation” in casual conversation
Tattoos
- Permanent art on your body
- Instant confidence boost
- Something to admire in the mirror
- Excellent conversation starter
- The ability to say “I collect tattoos” and sound mysterious
Winner: It’s a draw (both improve your quality of life, just differently)
Social Perception: What Others Think
Therapy
- “Good for you for taking care of your mental health!”
- Respect for self-awareness
- Slightly awkward when you mention it at dinner parties
- Your gran still doesn’t quite understand but supports you anyway
Tattoos
- Mixed reactions depending on your gran’s generation
- Instant bonding with other tattooed individuals
- Colleagues pretending they didn’t notice your new ink
- Complete strangers feeling entitled to share their opinions
Winner: Therapy (society has finally caught up and decided mental health matters)
Practical Applications in Daily Life
Things Therapy Helps With:
- Relationship conflicts
- Work stress
- Family drama
- Existential crises
- Fear of commitment
- Properly processing emotions instead of bottling them up like a proper Brit
Things Tattoos Help With:
- Looking cool in photos
- Having something to fidget with when nervous
- Instant credibility in certain social circles
- Covering up that regrettable tattoo from your 18th birthday
- Giving your hands somewhere to go during awkward conversations
Winner: Therapy (but tattoos definitely help with that confidence thing)
Long-Term Outcomes
Therapy After 5 Years:
- Improved mental health
- Better communication skills
- Reduced anxiety
- Healthy coping mechanisms
- The ability to have difficult conversations without crying
- Still occasionally using therapeutic phrases that make your mates roll their eyes
Tattoos After 5 Years:
- Might need a touch-up
- Still look brilliant in the right lighting
- Part of your identity now
- Source of stories and memories
- Possible gateway to more tattoos (it’s a slippery slope, we warned you)
Winner: Both age differently but well
The Northern 92 Professional Opinion
Look, we’re obviously biased—we’re in the business of permanent art, not temporary feelings. But here’s our completely unprofessional psychological assessment:
Why not both?
Think about it:
- Therapy sorts out your head
- Tattoos make your body look brilliant
- Therapy helps you make better life decisions
- Tattoos commemorate the questionable ones
- Therapy teaches you to love yourself
- Tattoos give you something lovely to love about yourself
When to Choose Therapy:
- You’re having thoughts of self-harm
- Your coping mechanisms involve too much wine and online shopping
- You’ve started arguments with three different people this week
- You’re considering getting your ex’s name tattooed (please don’t)
- You’re reading this article and thinking “Maybe I should call someone”
When to Choose Tattoos:
- You’ve sorted your head out and want to celebrate
- You have a meaningful design that represents personal growth
- You’ve been thinking about it for ages and keep coming back to the same idea
- You want to mark a significant life event
- You’ve done your research and found a brilliant artist (like those lovely people at Northern 92)
The Hybrid Approach: Advanced Life Management
Some of our clients have discovered the ultimate life hack: therapy to process the feelings, tattoos to commemorate the journey. It’s like having your emotional cake and eating it too, but with more needles and better artwork.
Consider this progression:
- Go to therapy, sort out your issues
- Celebrate your growth with meaningful ink
- Use your tattoo as a permanent reminder of how far you’ve come
- Confuse your therapist by getting more tattoos to mark each breakthrough
- Realise you’ve accidentally created a visual timeline of your personal development
A Word of Caution
Before you rush off to get “EMOTIONAL STABILITY” tattooed across your knuckles, remember:
- Tattoos don’t actually solve problems (shocking, we know)
- Good mental health requires more than good ink
- Impulse tattoos and emotional crises don’t mix well
- Your therapist probably has opinions about your tattoo choices (but they’re professionally obligated to be supportive)
The Final Verdict
While we’d love to claim that tattoos are the solution to all of life’s problems, we’re legally obligated to admit that they’re not. They’re brilliant for self-expression, marking important moments, and making you feel like an absolute legend, but they won’t cure your anxiety or fix your relationship with your mother.
What they will do is give you something beautiful to look at while you’re working through your issues—preferably with a qualified professional who can actually help with the deep stuff.
Conclusion: Why Not Have Both?
At Northern 92 Tattoo Studio in Burnley, we believe in comprehensive self-care. Get therapy to sort out your head, then come see us to celebrate your progress with some brilliant ink. Think of it as a two-pronged approach to life improvement: internal work and external art.
Just remember: we can make you look cooler, but we can’t make you emotionally stable. That’s what therapists are for.
Ready to add some therapeutic art to your self-care routine? Book a consultation at Northern 92—where we’ll help you process your feelings into something beautiful (but we’ll still recommend you ring your therapist about the deeper stuff).
